What We Carry

Stop me if you’ve heard this one—well, you can try, but this is one of those stories worth revisiting. Often.

Every time I do, it gives me that cheeky chuckle and the humble reminder that I so very much need.

So here goes.

Two monks were walking together on foot, making their way toward a gathering at a monastery quite a long distance away.

One was the elder. Measured. Calm. A knowing peace emanating from his wispy silver eyebrows and kind complexion.

The other was younger. Relatively new to his robes, but eager nonetheless, and undoubtedly committed to his teachings.

Their path wound through forest and riverbend, and after a while, they arrived at a crossing. The river was high, fast-moving, and muddy from recent rain.

At the edge of the river stood a young woman dressed in exquisitely fine clothing.

She looked deeply distressed.

She explained that she was on her way to an important family ceremony. But with the water moving as it was, she was afraid to risk walking across. Her outfit could be ruined, and worse yet, she could be swept away.

The older monk empathized with her situation and, stepping forward, gently bowed and asked, “Would you like me to carry you across?”

She nodded, relieved by his proposal.

And so, with her consent, he lifted her upon his shoulders and carried her through the water to the other side.

He set her down gently.

She thanked him.

He nodded in kind.

And he returned to the path, walking quietly as before.

The younger monk followed by his side.

But you could tell something in him had shifted.

They continued walking for two, maybe three more hours.

Yet, there was a sense of a storm brewing in the younger monk’s mind.

Finally, when he could hold it no longer, he said,

“Brother, with all due respect, as monks, we’ve taken vows—one of which being not to touch women, let alone carry them. I just can’t comprehend it, how could you possibly break our vows so easily?”

The older monk barely slowed in step, turned to his young companion, and with a kind smile, offered this:

Brother, I carried her for all but twenty seconds.
You have been carrying her for twenty miles.
Isn’t it about time you set her down?

That line always gets me.

Because I’ve done it, and I’m sure you have to.

Carried something—mentally, emotionally, spiritually—far longer than we’ve needed to.

A brief moment, a tense exchange, a regrettable choice—looping incessantly in our minds without pause or fail.

We carry what didn’t go as we would’ve wanted it.

What confused us. What offended us.

Disappointment. Regret. Resentment.

What we think we should have said, or shouldn’t have felt.

But the humbling truth is this:

Sometimes, the wisest thing to do is simply to notice what we’re still holding onto—what we’re still carrying—and give ourselves permission to set it down.

Reflections for Growth

• What Are You Still Carrying?

  Is there a moment—recent or long ago—that you continue to replay or ruminate on? What has kept it alive within you?

• Whose Weight Is It, Really?

  Is this burden actually yours to carry? Or are you holding onto someone else’s words, expectations, or unresolved energy?

• What Would Letting Go Feel Like?

  If you could release this moment—just for a breath, just for today—how might your body, your mind, or your spirit respond?

Invitations for Practice

• How Much Longer?

  When you notice yourself looping on a certain thought, emotion, or judgment, ask yourself “How much longer do I need to carry this maiden?” and “What do I need to do in order to set her down?” Notice what shifts.

• Checking In As We Practice Setting Down

  Each evening this week, ask yourself: What did I set down today that I no longer needed to hold? Just notice and name it.

• Let the Body Let Go

  Go on a short walk, preferably in nature or somewhere spacious. With each exhale, silently say: I don’t have to carry this any longer. Let your body lead the way in releasing whatever it’s ready to let go.

As you practice, please jot down your thoughts and experiences. And as always, feel free to share your reflections directly with me.

Kindly,

If you’re enjoying Weaving Wisdoms, please consider sharing it with someone you feel might enjoy it as well.